People who tolerate bad boundaries and the subsequent violations are very much like the narcissist and parental alienator, as they have not developed a strong perception of Separate Self. These individuals have grown in families where intrusions were accepted and were not given the support for autonomy. Nevertheless, alienating abusers are not very likely to seek professional help, as they are shame-intolerant, salted with the inability to recognize their own narcissism. Many therapists ignore or miss the possibility to diagnose NPD, as it is not amenable to health insurance companies who pay for patients and favor a short-term treatment approach.
Children who become severely alienated from a once-loved parent and who have developed Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS), frequently become brutally narcissistic and cruelly abusive during adolescence. As Aristotle re marked “Youth is easily deceived because it is quick to hope.” Their intensity to hate the people they once loved grows, sometimes to the point of violence or threats thereof, kleptomania, and in some instances, teens may commit suicide or parricide.