Just as it is normal for little children to be egocentric at an early age, feeling important or even invincible, the NPA becomes locked into that stage and never grows out of it. When the NPA allows their child to feel too important, giving them too much control, that child will inevitably maintain their infantile fantasy of power to control their parents, thereby hindering their ability to stand alone in later years. These children learn how to hone their skills by scanning their environment, seeking out others who can fulfill their own narcissistic supply, eventually becoming an alienator themselves. This way, the child(ren) can share the household parental power, usurp and maintain control at the expense of the target parent, and, at the same time, cater to the needs of the infantile NPA who gains their internal gratification from the child’s or teen’s behavior and the pain caused to the target parent.

People who tolerate bad boundaries and the subsequent violations are very much like the narcissist and parental alienator, as they have not developed a strong perception of Separate Self. These individuals have grown in families where intrusions were accepted and were not given the support for autonomy. Nevertheless, alienating abusers are not very likely to seek professional help, as they are shame-intolerant, salted with the inability to recognize their own narcissism. Many therapists ignore or miss the possibility to diagnose NPD, as it is not amenable to health insurance companies who pay for patients and favor a short-term treatment approach.

Children who become severely alienated from a once-loved parent and who have developed Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS), frequently become brutally narcissistic and cruelly abusive during adolescence. As Aristotle remarked “Youth is easily deceived because it is quick to hope.” Their intensity to hate the people they once loved grows, sometimes to the point of violence or threats thereof, kleptomania, and in some instances, teens may commit suicide or parricide.

Medical Journals in the UK

There are many medical journals that are published in the UK and cover a wide range of medical topics. Some of the most well-known medical journals in the UK include:

  1. The British Medical Journal (BMJ) – a weekly peer-reviewed medical journal that covers a broad range of medical topics, including clinical practice, public health, and medical research.
  2. The Lancet – a weekly peer-reviewed medical journal that covers a wide range of medical topics, including clinical practice, public health, and medical research.
  3. The New England Journal of Medicine (NEJM) – a weekly peer-reviewed medical journal that covers a broad range of medical topics, including clinical practice, public health, and medical research.
  4. The Journal of the Royal Society of Medicine – a monthly peer-reviewed medical journal that covers a wide range of medical topics, including clinical practice, public health, and medical research.
  5. The Annals of Internal Medicine – a bi-weekly peer-reviewed medical journal that focuses on internal medicine and covers a broad range of medical topics.

These journals are just a few examples of the many medical journals that are published in the UK. Medical professionals can subscribe to these journals or access them through a medical library or online database.

Q & A – What is in the new DSM?

The DSM-5 (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fifth Edition), which is the most recent version of the manual, was published in 2013 and introduced several new diagnostic categories and changes from the previous version, DSM-IV-TR.

Some of the significant changes and additions in DSM-5 include:

  1. Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) – This category combines four previously distinct diagnoses (autistic disorder, Asperger’s disorder, childhood disintegrative disorder, and pervasive developmental disorder not otherwise specified) into a single diagnostic category.
  2. Disruptive Mood Dysregulation Disorder – This new disorder was added to describe severe and recurrent temper outbursts that are inconsistent with developmental level and occur frequently.
  3. Binge Eating Disorder – This disorder was elevated from a provisional diagnosis in DSM-IV-TR to a full diagnostic category in DSM-5, reflecting the growing recognition of its clinical significance.
  4. Obsessive-Compulsive and Related Disorders – This new category includes disorders that were previously classified under anxiety disorders in DSM-IV-TR, such as hoarding disorder, trichotillomania (hair-pulling disorder), and excoriation (skin-picking) disorder.
  5. Cultural Formulation Interview – This new section in DSM-5 provides a structured way for clinicians to consider cultural factors that may impact diagnosis and treatment of mental health disorders.

It’s worth noting that the DSM-5 represents a significant departure from previous versions of the manual, particularly in its approach to diagnostic categories and its emphasis on dimensional assessment rather than categorical diagnosis.

Q & A – Is pathological lying a mental illness?

Pathological lying is not a formal psychiatric diagnosis or mental illness in and of itself. However, it can be a symptom of various psychiatric disorders, such as personality disorders, bipolar disorder, and borderline personality disorder.

People who engage in pathological lying may have difficulty distinguishing between reality and fantasy, or they may lie to achieve a specific goal or to avoid negative consequences. Pathological lying can also be a learned behavior or a result of past trauma or abuse.

Treatment for pathological lying typically involves addressing any underlying psychiatric conditions or addressing the behavior directly through therapy or counseling. It’s important to note that treatment can be challenging, as individuals who engage in pathological lying may be resistant to acknowledging or changing their behavior.

Q & A – there is no communication or trust with my daughter?

If there is no communication or trust with your daughter, it can be difficult to address the situation and work towards a resolution. However, there are still steps you can take to help improve the situation and maintain your relationship with your grandchildren.

It may be helpful to try and reach out to other family members or friends who can act as a mediator or go-between for you and your daughter. This could be a family therapist or counselor who can help facilitate communication and address any underlying issues or conflicts that may be contributing to the situation.

If your daughter is unwilling to engage in communication or is behaving in a way that is harmful to your relationship with your grandchildren, it may be necessary to set boundaries and seek legal or professional support to protect your rights and the well-being of your grandchildren.

Remember that it’s important to prioritize your own emotional well-being and to seek support from friends, family, or a therapist during this difficult time. It can be challenging to navigate these types of family conflicts, but with patience, understanding, and perseverance, it is possible to work towards a resolution and maintain a positive relationship with your grandchildren.

Q & A – Is it a sign of mental illness to frighten your children with lies about grandparents?

It is possible that your adult child’s behavior could be a sign of mental illness, such as a personality disorder or a psychotic disorder. Only a qualified mental health professional can make a proper diagnosis.

That being said, intentionally lying to children in order to scare them or cause harm is not a normal or healthy behavior. It can have a significant negative impact on the children’s mental health and well-being, as well as the relationship between your daughter and your grandchildren.

It may be helpful to encourage your child to seek the help of a mental health professional who can assess their behavior and provide appropriate treatment or therapy. You could also consider seeking support from a family therapist who can help you and your adult child to work through any issues and improve communication and understanding within the family.

Q & A – What is it called when your adult child tells lies about you?

It is called defamation or slander if your adult child is intentionally spreading false and damaging information about you to others. Defamation is the act of making false statements that harm a person’s reputation or standing in the community. Slander specifically refers to spoken defamation.

If the false statements are communicated in writing, it is known as libel. In any case, such behavior is not acceptable and can cause significant emotional distress and damage to one’s reputation.

Q & A – Help? my daughter is telling my grandchildren lies about me to scare them.

I’m sorry to hear that. It sounds like a difficult situation to deal with. If your daughter is intentionally lying to your grandchildren to cause fear or harm, this could be considered emotional abuse or psychological manipulation.

It may be helpful to try and address the situation directly with your daughter and express your concerns about how her behavior is impacting you and your relationship with your grandchildren. You could also consider seeking the advice of a family counselor or therapist who can provide support and guidance on how to approach the situation.

If the situation becomes more serious or you believe that your grandchildren are in danger, it may be necessary to involve the authorities or seek legal advice to protect their well-being.

Lying to your therapist

It is not always easy for a therapist to tell if a client is lying. While some therapists may have developed intuition and experience that help them pick up on cues that suggest a client is not being truthful, there is no foolproof method for detecting dishonesty. Additionally, therapists often focus on the client’s emotional state and motivations rather than the specifics of their story, so they may not be as concerned with whether a client is telling the truth or not. It’s important for clients to be honest with their therapist, as this can help them receive more effective treatment.

Q & A – What happens when you lie to social workers?

Lying to social workers can have serious consequences, as social workers are responsible for protecting vulnerable individuals, such as children, elderly, and disabled persons. When social workers suspect that someone may be lying to them, they will typically investigate further to determine the truth.

Social workers may use a variety of techniques to verify the information they are given, such as interviewing other witnesses, conducting home visits, reviewing medical records, or collaborating with other professionals such as law enforcement or healthcare providers. They may also ask open-ended questions and look for inconsistencies in the individual’s story.

If a social worker determines that someone has lied to them, it can impact the services or assistance that person receives. For example, if a parent lies to a social worker about their ability to care for their child, the social worker may remove the child from the home or recommend that the parent receive parenting classes or counseling.

In some cases, lying to a social worker can also result in criminal charges if the lie is related to a crime, such as child abuse or neglect. It is always best to be honest with social workers, as they are there to help and provide support to individuals and families in need.

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