A True Story – Lundy Bancroft

This is a guest post by a survivor, ‘Ava,’ who sent me one of the most inspiring and encouraging stories I’ve heard in a long time. It’s also a painful story, but it demonstrates that conditions can improve dramatically sometimes. So keep on fighting for a life of freedom and love – it is your birthright.

Continue reading “A True Story – Lundy Bancroft”


Just been tidying up the website after the relaunch  two weeks ago under the new name of parentalalienationpas.com without the old hyphen!

Deleting some very old posts and came across this one from two years ago!

It’s now 30 years and no change and I don’t anticipate any changes now or in the future.

After two decades of being told it was my Son In Laws fault, then her fathers fault, that I did not get to see my two grandchildren when they where born, I was blocked on every social media site. I was not able to get hold of an address, I had no means of contact or even sending anything.

My daughter has come in and out of my life at her convenience when she wanted money or was in trouble, more out than in.

I have endured years of trolling and contacting clients through social media with lies and accusations!

The picture below is a fake Facebook profile which was planted on my business pages contacting all my clients. I discovered later that the gentleman is actually a famous actor who played in the series Jeckyll and Hyde – How appropriate!!

So when the abuse continues now using my grandaughter  as a pawn I have come to the acceptance that this is never ever going to change.

My son in law has been out of her life for over two years now and she is old enough to know better. She has driven every person who loved and cared for her out of her life including friends and family. It is her responsibility, no one else.

I have not seen or heard from my son for over thirty years and have no address or contact details for him but as far as I know, he has not behaved in the same way as his sister, unless it has been covert!

Nothing would surprise me anymore!!

This is the fallout from the most Severe Parental Alienation

Parental alienation that has gone this far is totally irreversible, the behaviour becomes part of a persons character over the years.


11:11 – A very revealing day for me – published 2020


Well after my previous post about 11:11 I could not have believed how revealing a day it would be for me!

After several years of no contact with my birth mother for no apparent reason, I discovered why at 4.10am yesterday morning, yes 4.10 on the 11:11 due to the time difference in Australia.

The conversation started that” I needed to see a psychiatrist and I was totally screwed”. 

I challenged her on her statement and discovered that my ex husband had been contacting her after being divorced for over 28 years.!

Yes CONTACTING my biological mother 28 YEARS AFTER THE DIVORCE

(I was adopted at 6 weeks)

It never ends, the pathological lying and the deceit.

Lies about my mother who died 3 years ago and is not here to defend herself, lies about her character, stories about her generosity and charity and community work twisted into a sick story .

Lies about money and the divorce settlement.

So just to set the story straight here is the final bill out of 140,000 pounds back in 1994 after 8 years of fighting to see my children. (I still have not seen my son in 30 years)


Yes after 8 years of fighting and 14 years of marriage, I finally received 6,392.00 pounds 23.79% of the total proceeds.

At least I got something which is more than his last girlfriend received after 12 years of being together.

So to set set the record straight:



What is toxic positivity?

Image result for pretending to be positive

What is Toxic Positivity? We define toxic positivity as the excessive and ineffective overgeneralization of a happy, optimistic state across all situations. The process of toxic positivity results in the denial, minimization, and invalidation of the authentic human emotional experience.

True Story


1991 My children stayed with me until after the divorce until the financial settlement.1992 – My ex husband went for residency order for each child on their twelfth birthdays, I was encouraged to go along with this by a so-called long-term local friend who said it was for the best, so my ex husband would be able to take them holiday without always asking for my permission.(They never got to go on holiday in all the years they lived with him) Unknown to me the so-called friend was sleeping with my ex!!


Posting again by popular request!

Money Money Money

Money Money Money

I have received many questions from alienated parents asking what would it take to reverse PA after many, many years?

Sadly I cannot answer that, I can only tell you from my own experiences.

My daughter has been in and out of my life over the past 15 years, more out than in. I have missed all the significant events in her life, birth of grandchildren etc, birthdays and Christmas’s. She use to blame her ex and her father but I have discovered recently that it was her own choice and no one else’s. When I once asked her “what if one day you all In love with someone who has nothing” Her reply was “that will never ever happen, I will never stay in a relationship with someone who does not have loads of money” Speaks volumes………

When I asked her why my son had not seen me for over 30 years her response was “he will talk to you if you give him 10,000 pound”. Even if I win the lottery this is never going to happen.

On every single occasion I was lured in by her fake persona, believing that she really wanted a relationship with me, and on every single occasion the same thing would happen. Eventually after luring me into a false sense of security it would come. The guilt trip, asking for money to pay debts, horses, bills, etc etc. Immediately after paying she would dump me, just like everyone else she knew. I fell for this several times over the years. 

Why did I believe I was any different from anyone else she she used and abused??

So after many years of no contact, and being raised by her money orientated father, who is exactly the same, why would either of them be any different?

I have been raised to believe that relationships, friendship and love are built on mutual respect and trust, money has nothing to do with it. But everyone is different

So my advice would be to be true to yourself, do no try to buy their love. Live a good honest life free from the shackles of Parental Alienation.

Focus on the people who do want to be in your life, embrace the good.

Live you best life.

Linda – Always By Your Side

Photo by Alexander Mils on Pexels.com

Natural Born Liars – The Yo Yo effect

May was in and out of her mothers life like a Yo Yo!!

After not bothering for many years May decided to pay her mother a visit when she was 18. She wanted money for medical reasons, her mother happily gave her the money then was very quickly dumped.

The next occcassion was she needed money for her horse, again mother coughed up like parents do, and yes you guessed it dumped again.

This pattern continued for several years.

There was even one occasion when May turned up at her grandmothers house escorted by the Police for shoplifting, claiming that’s where she lived. grandmother told the officer she had not seen her for at least 10 years.

Spain – May wanted her things furniture and belongings shipped from Spain when she left for Australia. Mother paid 2,800 for shipment to her home where she had storage. May told everyone that mother had stolen the furniture and belongings after dumping her yet again!!!

Australia – wanted money to invest in a horse that was having a prize winning foal. Discovered years later the horse was on loan and not even her horse. Mother never had a return on her investment and May knew she wouldn’t. – not seen for several years after.

Bournemouth – May needed money again to pay huge livery bills she had run up, mother paid again and was swiftly dumped.

Spain to UK – Mays horses and the family dog had been left in Spain and again May had run up huge debts even though her husband was giving her plenty of money to pay for her extravagant lifestyle of nannies, cleaners etc etc. When she had bled her husband dry, and her father refused to pay, it was mother who put her hand in her pocket and paid for her and her daughters horse and all the kennel fees for the dog to be returned to the UK. She told her friends she had paid for it!!!!

Yes you know how the story goes…….


Mother had had enough – she was no longer desperate to see her daughter just to be financially abused over and over again.

Mother did not take it personally because it was the way May was with everyone who came into her life!

Mother felt sorry for anyone who came Mays way, they would be left broke and high and dry.


So Funny Reminds me of someone?

You know it’s all about me [4x]
Don’t hate me ’cause I got it goin’ on
It’s just me, I’m hot never cold
I can rock it any way that I choose
I’m so good (Oh yeah)
I make up all the rules
I can’t help it if I set all the trends
Everybody wants to be my best friend
It’s infectious, come on don’t you be jealous
Just join in this love fest
You know that
It’s all about me
It’s all about me
Oh yeah, me, myself and I
It’s all about me
It’s all about me
(You know It’s all about me)
It’s all about me me me me me
Everybody knows that it’s all about me
M-m-m-myspace I have ten million friends
T-t-t-text me bff ’til the end
P-p-p-page me on your cell and press send
Diva what? Diva who? Diva where? That’s me!
D-d-d-download all my crazy new hooks
U-u-u-upload all my video looks
So buy my ringtone, fashion line and cookbooks
Diva what? Diva who? Diva where?
It’s all about me
It’s all about me
Oh yeah, me, myself and I
It’s all about me
It’s all about me (You know it’s all about me)
It’s all about me me me me me
Everybody knows that it’s all about me
Don’t blame her I’m so beautiful
Not her fault I’m platinum and gold
She’s the queen and my reign is supreme
So follow the leader you’re all on my team
I can’t help it if I set all the trends
Everybody wants to be my best friend
It’s contagious and it’s so outrageous
Grandparents, grown-ups, kids of all ages
You know Madonna ain’t got nothin’ on me
B-B-B-Beyonce ain’t got nothin’ on me
C-C-C-Christina ain’t got nothin’ on me
Diva what? Diva who? Diva where? That’s me!
You know Mariah ain’t got nothin’ on me
F-F-F-Fergie ain’t got nothin’ on me
G-Gwen Stefani ain’t got nothin’ on me
Diva what? Diva who? Diva where? That’s me!
You know it’s all about me
I’m a speciality
You know it’s all about me
I’m an anomaly
You know it’s all about me, who else could it be?
Upload, download, text me, page me
MySpace, Youtube don’t erase me
Fergie, J-Lo, Gwen Stefani
You know they got nothin’ on me
Indoor, outdoor I’m so clever
That’s why I will rule forever

Natural Born Liars – Con Artists

May had been on benefits her whole life, from the day she left school at 14 up until the age of 42. Its the only thing she knew how, its the only thing Kram had taught her over the years, how to scam the system!

Everyone boyfriend she ever had, had been chosen by Kram, someone he could manipulate and fleece, similar to the girlfriends he chose. Their philosophy in life was why work for money when you can extort money out of others who loved you, and milk the system.

May decided to open yet another fake company injecting BOTOX and fillers. She had been there before many years ago back in Bournemouth, where she befriended a Turkish man posing to be a BOTOX doctor. They worked together in her salon pulling in unsuspecting clients. He botched so many people who ended up in hospital, he ended up in prison.

This is what they did well, Kram and May worked as a team befriending flying monkeys and using them to do their dirty work. The flying monkeys would often end up in trouble and Kram and May would feign innocence to the authorities walking away unscathed and Scott free, laughing all the way to the bank. May and her sidekick Kram always left a trail of devastation behind them, it was their game plan.

Pseudologia fantastica – they invented the word!



What is a Flying Monkey

Flying monkeys is a phrase sometimes used in popular psychology to describe people who are acting at the behest of another to control a targeted individual. It is a metaphor taken from the Wizard of Oz wherein the Wicked Witch of the West used winged monkeys to carry out evil deeds on her behalf

“The Monkeys caught Dorothy in their arms and flew away with her.”

Natural Born Liars – cruelty

May often accused Kram her father of being cruel to animals, she said during her time in Florida when fleeing from the police and the false statement about the burglary, that Kram her father had starved her dog she had left behind. She reported that the neighbours had videod Kram throwing the dog outside whilst having several different women at her house. She said over the years that Kram had damaged and harmed her horses, and on one occasion had one of her horses put down whilst she was on holiday with a boyfriend in Spain.

Kram had lived with May and her husband for several years pretending to all his flying monkeys that he owned the house when in fact it was actually rented and it was Mays husband who paid all the bills. When Mays husband finally got fed up with all Krams promiscuous behaviour constantly bringing different women to the house in front of his children he finally decided to throw him out.

Thats when all the trouble started, dead pheasants hanging outside the front door, abusive phone calls and texts.

This is when May and Kram decided to plot the burglary, if Kram could not enjoy the comfortable parasitic lifestyle at someone else’s expense he would make Mays husband pay in other ways

Natural Born Liars – part deux – click here for more

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